Injured Joel Embiid Could Return Library Book Later This Week

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When the 76ers drafted Joel Embiid they didn’t expect him to play for several months. He had a hurt foot and a poor grasp of the English language without a rough and somewhat charming accent.

Months after joining the Sixers without a single game logged, reports are coming out that Embiid may be actively preparing to return a library book later this week.

“We wanted to keep Embiid off the court until things got settled with the Public Library,” said Sixers’ general manager Sam Hinkie. “We’re not a team that likes to employ controversial figures. An overdue library book is serious business. To allow him to play while it was checked out and overdue does not represent this team properly. We do things in a very timely fashion.”

According to the guy who cleans the garbage cans at the library, the overdue library book is “Great Expectations” by Charles Dickens. The book came heavily recommended to Embiid by Hinkie based on its title and awful finished product. Hinkie has a soft-spot for stories like that.

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