Former 76er and First Round Pick Evan Turner Officially a Woman’s Bust


Selected 2nd overall in the 2010 NBA Draft, the Philadelphia 76ers took Evan Turner with their first pick. A historically weak draft, Turner struggled for a terrible team and only had a few standout moments. In 2014 he was traded to the Indiana Pacers and this season he has found himself playing with the Boston Celtics. After playing as long as he has without reaching his potential, it can officially be declared that Turner is a woman’s bust.

“He’s a boob,” said Turner’s current teammate Rajon Rondo. “Two actually. He’s a pair of boobs. How did the 76ers not realize they were using their number one pick on titties?”

Not uncommon, busts do get selected. This can most likely be blamed on a man’s inability to ignore a nice pair of meaty breasts.

“Men are pigs and will do whatever they can to get near boobs,” said Feminist Everygirlyouevermetandhate Jones. “They say they follow sports for the drama and competition, but seeing busts like Turner selected so high, it’s clear their agenda is against women.”

Turner’s time in Philadelphia will in time be forgotten. In terms of the bust-size, he was only a B-Cup compared to the Double-Ds known as Shaun Bradley.


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