Television personality Mike Rowe will be visiting the Phillies next season to tape an episode of his show Dirty Jobs. The show’s premise, if you live under a rock or in a religious household, is Rowe undertaking dirty jobs: typically ones nobody wants to do, but do anyway because they didn’t graduate high school.
When Rowe visits the Phillies next season he will start a game for them as a pitcher and be expected to win despite what will most likely to be very minimal run support.
“It’s the dirtiest job I’ve ever had,” said Rowe. “I spoke with Cole Hamels about it. He laughed in my face.”
In the past Rowe has had jobs like pig scrotum cleaner and high school principal. However none of those jobs have ever prepared him for this.
“I know a lot about baseball and looking over this lineup I’m scared,” said Rowe. “Are these really position player batting averages?”
There’s no backing out now for Rowe as General Manager Ruben Amaro Jr. has already signed him to a very expensive, lengthy, and back-end loaded contract even though he didn’t have to pay him.