Eagles Sign Dick Moles to Complete “oles” Trifecta

DICK MOLES

Having Nick Foles and Darren Sproles already on the roster, the Eagles went out seeking help from another “oles” to complete the rhyming trifecta. Earlier today, the team officially signed free agent Dick Moles to complete a trio of exciting offensive players.

Before coming to the Eagles, Dick Moles was very undesirable. Showing up unexpectedly, Dick Moles has a reputation as a selfish player.

Why though, with the team the way it is, would the Eagles go out of their way to add Dick Moles to the locker room when they know the problem Dick Moles can cause?

“Dick moles is great at making it down the field,” said General Manager Howie Roseman. “He’s always near the end zone and in spite of how ugly he is, we think Dick Moles will scare our opponents.”

At his first practice, Coach Chip Kelly urged his team to have as much contact with Dick Moles as possible stating, “I think he might be contagious.”

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